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We have Beards so we know Movies: Green Lantern (2011)

August 7, 2011

Ever since Amy Winehouse died I have been living my life in her honor (minus the drugs – who knew that doing drugs was so fucking expensive?!) and celebrated St. Patrick’s Day every day.

Well, at least that is my excuse to why I ended up dressed in green watching Green Lantern 3D yesterday.

It wasn’t… bad. It was kind of like Star Wars but told as if it was a serious remake of Krull, Masters of the Universe and Howard the Duck but without that flare of “unconscious masterpiece” to it.
The movie is about dudes across the universe getting a ring so they can materialize absinthe solid objects out of anything they can imagine. Sadly the writers didn’t have a big enough imagination because most of the shit that they came up with was fucking weak storytelling.

Oh, and lots of fat could be trimmed as well. Before Ryan Reynolds even get the ring we get to follow him as he takes adventurous journeys to… a kid’s birthday party where they mope and talk about set ups that’s already been established 20 times already. Who goes to see superhero movies to see the hero talk to annoying movie-kids (you know the kind of kids that seem to know everything the adults just don’t see yet) – especially when said movie-kid doesn’t even show up again later in the movie?

But it is still a pretty enjoyable film if you’re in the right mood.. If you are one of the billions of people that watched Transformers 3D you really don’t have a good excuse not to see this, okay?

This is just as silly as that one, however much better much thanks to how fun it is to see space adventures on film again, you actually understand what is going on and Ryan Reynolds is one fucking charming guy.
And it is a treat to see Peter Sarsgaard slowly transform into Philip Seymour Hoffman.

They have already announced a “darker and edgier” sequel and that is exactly the right direction… for a Batman movie.

A movie about imagination and fantasy and a guy wearing a green ring that looks like it came with the morning cereals shouldn’t go “dark and edgy”, okay?

More “We have Beards so we know Movies!” Reviews

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2
The Complete Death Wish Collection 1-5
Transformers: Dark of the Moon 3D
Super 8
Red Riding Hood
The Hangover Part II
Fast Five
Thor 3D
Tron: Legacy
The Social Network
The Expendables
The A-Team
A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

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