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Top Ten Animal Movies Starring Me and My Loaded Shotgun

May 26, 2011

janne-anorectic-muppet-megan-fox-band-t-shirtLast night I dreamt I went on a killing spree and hunted down the Smurfs Columbine-style.

No, not the great Smurfs from my sober childhood but the ones from that freak of a trailer I saw yesterday…

the animated comedy series and blog lunki and sika

I’d rather get raped than watch that movie. Hell, I’d rather get raped by Neil Patrick Harris than watch that movie.

Anyway, the dream was fun and got me inspired. This morning I made a list of movies I wish they’d make starring me and my shotgun:

  • 10. Finding Nemo 2. Ever heard the phrase “It’s like shooting fish in a barrel”? Yeah, it would be like shooting fish in a barrel. With my shotgun.
  • 9. Lassie. I would push that dog down the well faster than Mickey Rooney eats a pie. And then shoot them both. With my shotgun.
  • 8. Happy Feet. Yeah, I’ll make that penguin-freak dance. Dance you tapdancing freak, dance! Dance to the sound of my shotgun.
  • 7. Horton hears a Hoo 2. More like Horton hears the cocking of a double barreled shotgun.
  • 6. The Land before time XIV. What made the dinosaurs extinct? Me. And my shotgun.
  • 5. Star Wars VII – The Hunt for Jar Jar Binks.
  • 4. Bambi III. Who shot Bambi’s mom? Me. And now I’m back for more.
  • 3. Chicken Run 2. Yeah, they better run. From my shotgun.
  • 2. Who killed Roger Rabbit? Yup, me again! Wabbit Season.
  • 1. March of the Penguins 2 – Slaughter of the Penguins.
Don’t mistake this list for me hating the movies. No, I don’t hate these movies, I just want to kill these animals for fun. With my shotgun.

the animated comedy series and blog lunki and sika

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Top 10 Favorite Animal Movies

Top 10 Most Annoying TV Characters (2011 Edition)
Top 10 Steps to Becoming a Hollywood Celebrity
My Top 5 Worst Movies of 2010
My Top 10 Favorite Movies of 2010
My Top 10 Favorite TV Shows Older Than Me
My Top 10 Favorite Amnesia Movies
My Top 10 Favorite Kids Movies to make grown Men Cry
My Top 10 Favorite Lonely Movies
My Top 5 Unforgettable Movies

2 Comments leave one →
  1. May 26, 2011 10:59

    The best part of shooting all of those penguins is that you can eat them afterwards. It’s like having a meal with both chicken AND fish.

  2. May 27, 2011 10:59

    Yeah, I try to eat healthy and therefor only eat animals that are happy.

    Before I killed them.

    With my shotgun.

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