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A Masterpiece of Pee and Poo

September 20, 2010

Johnny the Intern with a dora the explorer t-shirt holding a coffee mugHello! Johnny the Intern here again! Here is the third and final chapter in the exciting story about my broken appendicitis and the race against time to get to a folk singer festival!

As I told you last time I was told by the doctors that I needed to show them I could go to the bathroom before I could leave the hospital. Three hours after the surgery I was finally left alone in my bed and I immediately got up and walked around to get the system started again. It didn’t happen but I had no problem walking and I credit the morphine I still had in my body for that.

Four hours later I tried it again, this time it wasn’t as easy. I felt like a beached baby whale trying to maneuver from the bed out on the floor, but I finally succeeded. Nauseous and in pain I wandered the hospital halls and when I got discovered by a nurse she sent me straight to bed again. She was quite mean.

Awoke three hours later. It was morning and two days before the festival. I now discovered that my stomach had started producing; but not in the way I wanted it to. My once so white hospital gown was now covered in blood all over the front. “This can’t be good”, I thought and called for help.

The doctor came in and told me it was just coagulated blood from the wound and that it was completely normal. So I asked him “That is fortunate! If it’s normal does that mean I get to go home today? I do have a folk singer festival to attend”.  He told me I still had to prove my pee and poo was working and that there was no blood in my bladder.

9.30am was a great moment for me. I made the perfect stool and when the nurse checked my bladder it was in perfect shape. As I suspected it would be!

At the morning rounds I got told that everything looked good but that they still didn’t want to discharge me. I had to wait until 4pm for that to happen. And when the doctor finally did it he wasn’t happy at all. Unlike me who two two days later got to go to the folk singer festival!!

the animated comedy series and blog lunki and sika
Part 1: The Stomachache from Hell
Part 2: My Operation Room Demand

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